Sunday, September 07, 2008

YOU'RE DOING WHAT?



Don't think for one minute that I would get on one of these! I am terrified of motorcycles. I had "fear" drilled into my head from a very early age. My father's brother had been killed on one when he was in his 20's. My mother forbid me to even sit my behind on one. And I didn't. You would never want to see the wrath of my mother. It wasn't a pretty picture!

I probably sound old fashioned and not "with the times". But I really don't like motorcycles at all. I see how people drive them when I'm in my car and I can't believe the tricks that some of these people do. I should direct this to the "young at heart" because when I say people, I don't mean our age people. I think people our ages would definitely think two or three times before buying an apparatus like the one pictured. I think they are referred to as "crotch rockets". I won't even elaborate on that one.

My whole reasoning for even writing about this motorcycle thing is because my oldest son mentioned to me about a month ago that he was going to buy one of these. He works approximately 45 minutes from his home and with the price of gas he thinks that riding this to work will save him lots of money.

He brought pictures along to show me and tried to soften me up on the idea. Well, it just doesn't work for me. He registered for classes because he wants to do the right thing. He wants to know all he can learn about safety. He's 36 and I assure you he is not getting this "bike" for racing purposes. I did ask him why he wasn't getting a Harley. I thought since he has his mind made up about getting a bike he would want to get a Harley. He said they were very expensive and that he wanted to get a Suzuki; something he would grow into. Now what in the heck does that mean? I didn't like the explanation that he gave me and I don't understand these things.

I asked him if he has ever seen the maniacs out on the road that I have. Weaving in and out of traffic and pulling wheelies. Coming within inches of cars. Some with helmets and some without. I even went as far as saying that maybe he should try to find someone to take him out on Interstate 95 and the 695 Beltway just to be able to relate to the noise that he will be hearing. Cause these are the roads that he will be taking to work. And then what about the weather? So it starts out being a beautiful day and at the end of your shift it has started to snow or worse yet, it has been snowing for a few hours. What happens then?

I am his mother, for heaven's sake. I will worry my self frantically about his safety. I have asked him repeatedly not to get this machine.....to think about his three year old son that would be devastated if anything were to happen to him. He assures me that he plans on using this bike safely and that he is going to be fine. So it sounds like he has made up his mind. And because he is an adult and doesn't have to listen to his mother, he will do what he wants.

Just because our children are adults and have their own lives now does not mean that we as parents do not worry about them. I'm sure that every parent must have these same feelings. We brought them into this world and our job was to nuture and protect them. Well I still want to protect them. They are on my mind at all times. And of course I rarely tell them this because they would think that I was a freak. And I am to a certain degree. I worry about things......someone has too!

Have any of you ever experienced this kind of thing with your children? Maybe it wasn't a motorcycle. Maybe it was a snowboard, skies or a sports car. But you felt the same way as I do.

Should I try dealing with this another way? And how would that be? Or do I just have to suck it up and pray to our Dear Lord and Savior that he will give the protection that is needed to keep him safe from harm?

9 comments:

Rudee said...

I know how I'd feel BJ! I'd be just like you, worried sick. I've taken care of cyclists who've landed in the ER with multiple injuries including, "road rash." If he won't listen to your concerns, maybe he'd consider wearing a St. Columbanus medal. Patron saint of motorcyclists.

Some motorcyclists are very safe and some are incredibly crazy on their crotch rockets. It's the drivers in cars you have to watch out for. I'm sure he knows all this-so do you. Get him the patron saint for fathers too, just in case. St. Joseph. To cover all your bases, St. Nicholas is the patron saint of children and St. Dymphna the saint for insanity. That should just about cover all your bases-and his.

The Crusty Crone said...

I put riding a motorcycle right up there with free-fall parachute jumping and Russian roulette. It just doesn't make sense.

Too bad he can't 'try it out' first before making the purchase. He just might change his mind, especially if the weather turns bad. I wonder how much it would be to rent one for a month... or two weeks.

I guess at 36 you still think of yourself as being young, when in reality the bones are starting to creak. Maybe he won't like it once he tries it. You know, bugs in your teeth... and the sweat from wearing leather can cause a rash. Good luck. I hope you are able to set the worry aside so it doesn't rob you of your enjoyment. (Guilt doesn't seem to work, either. I'm just saying.... )

Brenda said...

Ha Ha Ha Ha ....Rudee's comment cracked me up!!!!! I will be searching for the St. Dymphna medal for myself, Rudee.
I know how you feel BJ in that you can never stop worrying about your children no matter how old they are. Our mayor, well it is really in the next town over, but we know him personally, rides around on the motor bike. He is around 70 I think. Lots of older folks are getting them for gas mileage. I don't get it!!!! I don't like them and don't want one and don't want any one I know on them. Even though I went on them when I was young and fearless, or stupid...one of those two things. I don't like them!!! And especially old people should NOT be riding them. Worry and Pray is all a Mother can do. If that doesn't work then maybe try calling him about 8 times everyday to see how he is, and then he will get sick of it and get rid of it. I don't know what else to tell you. Maybe he won't get it....

Marsha said...

With your family history of losing an uncle I can totally understand your fear for your son. I also don't understand people who ride those crotch rockets. They are built for speed and racing, not road riding in my opinion. If only he would consider another cycle, Suzuki does carry models other than these types. Your son is doing the right thing by taking the safety classes and at his age, all mom's can do is advise and pray, they make their own decisions.
Not all motorcycle riders are like the ones you have described as you know my DH and I are avid cyclists. But, we were both scared out of our wits when our son first starting learning to drive one. Lucky for us, he decided it wasn't for him and quickly gave it up :-) Wishing you the best on this, a mother will never stop worrying about her child!

Sandy said...

I have one son who is a daredevil (Kenzie's daddy) and did the whole spectrum, snow boarding (without a helmet), quads, other things...I was always afraid for him and he did have a few close calls.

There's nothing you can do much but worry about them. Try surrounding him with "light" and blessing his choice and knowing he will be protected...maybe (weak smile) that will help.

cat's momma said...

BJ, my almost 67-year-old husband wants a motorcycle! My screams of NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooo probably can still be heard bouncing around the Universe. His driving a car isn't what it used to be, and I'm not about to lose him to a stupid accident on a stupid two-wheeled vehicle. My son-in-law just lost an acquaintance due to a motorcycle accident. It happend at night on a road where four teenagers thought it would be just hilarious to drag a big tree branch out to the middle of road and see what kind of havoc they could cause. Now they have to live with having caused a man's death. I HATE motorcycles and I hate how crazily lots of "macho" guys drive them. I pray your son is careful and not a daredevil.

Mary said...

BJ, you are not freak. We worry about our babies, toddles, pre-teens, teens, and adult children with increasing intensity. But, he'll be safe. Keep telling yourself he'll be safe, even on 95 and 695. Motorcyles are the rage now for apparently good reasons.

Like you, I have a fear of motorcyles after seeing someone die on one when I was only 10 years old (no helmets then and he was a nut). My nephew died on one without a helmet - with one, he would have lived but he was also a reckless 22 year old.

I'll tell you this: I work in a law enforcement environment and a police officer friend finally got me on his motorcyle, slowly, around the parking lot. I held on for life. But, you know what? I loved it!!!! Now he wants to take me on the roads. I'm scared but I do trust him.

Signing off for now,
Motorcyle Mama

BJ said...

Thank you all for your comments! I enjoyed reading what you had to say.

I had replied to each of you individually.......but blogger decided to FART when I pushed the "publish your comment" button last night. And all that had been written was somewhere else; in the crapper I suppose. And my brain had reached it's limit! And I didn't want to go back and re-comment.

Just take my word for it! I love you man!

Wanda said...

Oh BJ ~~ Yes, I have been there! My son was in his 20's when he bought a motorcycle, even back then it was cheaper than a car and that was his reasoning.

How did I handle it...on my knees most of the time. I was anxious especially in bad weather, like CC said, but I finally had to just open my hand and heart to a God I trust, and prayed every day a hedge of protection around my son.

After one winter...and one near accident, he sold the bike..the happiest day of my life!!!

Love and Hugs...
Wanda